Lobbying for Change

His legs were crossed on the hotel floor in the lobby at one in the morning. He was shirtless, and his abs were impeccable. Beside him was a friend I had met just eight weeks prior. She was fifty-five and suffering with winter depression from the long gray cold days. He had performed miracles that evening that I had not noticed. The kitchen was closed, yet, we were eating a cheese steak, the bar was closed but we were drinking the drinks of our choices, and the jacuzzi had ceased operations for the evening but all three of us were still dripping wet because my fifty-five-year-old friend had never been in a whirlpool before. We were a motley crew of individuals welcoming in the late-night party goers in a five-star hotel on a Florida beach. This was where the cliché statement “you will meet someone who changes your life” took on meaning.

He was twenty-three and (did I say?) gorgeous. I hated his look. I disliked his lack of refinement and the fact that he was staring at me. He was not my one. My friend allowed him to sit while we drank our teas and he began to talk. One hour, two hours, three hours passed by, and the fifty-five-year-old was still cackling and sharing motherly advice to him. I was unimpressed, but then he asked me a question I had heard repeated often since my divorce. Why are you so guarded? I opened my mouth to answer and the truth fell out. The highlights of the awful stories from marriage compiled themselves into a short story of sorrow. He listened, and my friend listened, both of them said nothing for a beat. He slid into a chair next to the fireplace.

“I want you to know, that what you have been through, makes you a great person. You should wear each one of those horrors as a badge of honor on your chest for the world to see.”

A last-minute trip, a six-hour conversation with a man a decade my junior, said a sentence that changed everything. I was valuable, useful again. My experiences were badges not scars. A twelve-year fog lifted that evening and I could see the world, not only see it… but be a part of it again.

We went home early from our vacation to beat a nor ’easterner snow storm back to our respective abodes, but his words stayed with me. I built from there. I put together an anthology that landed us on national television in England, formed a group of women to speak out about abuse, created a reality tv show all from a twenty-three-year-old sitting on the lobby floor in the wee hours of the morning.

Many days, I think back to those hours spent in his company and wonder if it hadn’t been for the fluke trip what I would have been doing now? I don’t know the answer to that. I do know there are moments, and there are people, built for creating new opportunities. If I would have blinked, I would have missed mine. I would still be waiting for the person who would change my life, my prince charming. I am so glad this (did I say?) gorgeous man walked into my life in sandals, ripped jeans, and shirtless. I am thrilled he persisted past the ice queen exterior. Thank you to this person who I hope will read this article, you know exactly who you are. You just don’t know what meeting you has done for me.

This article originally appeared in the Spring 2018 issue of CHOICES Magazine