Choose to Not Have Fear

I choose to not have fear. I will not be its victim. This situation is certainly not ideal, but it could be worse. I know you are probably thinking, “How could it possibly be worse?”

Over most of this past year, we have been inundated with all manner of fear-generating headline stories. This horrible coronavirus, the world’s economy…in the tanker! If this one or that one becomes President, it’s the end of the world!! Add to that, the list of things that are happening in your personal and professional worlds that rock your faith: children, spouse, job security, you name it. It seems we have a terminal case of anxiety about all of it.

Fear’s insidious reach seems to extend into every corner of our lives. The topic in one form or another seems to be on everyone’s mind and the focus of almost every conversation. It’s like a 12-armed octopus that wraps itself around our good sense, reaching in and paralyzing us with its tentacles. It’s like being in one of those B-rated foreign films where the 20-foot monster lumbers forward wiping out everything in its path, while paralyzed humans stand staring and screaming.

“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” So, what is a rational, creative, intelligent human being to do in the face of fear and anxiety?

1) Decide what is worthy of fear, and what is fictitious nonsense masquerading as the boogie man. Real fear is caused when a particular threat presents itself. Fictitious fear is: “What if this or that happens? What if I lose my job or all my customers desert me?” The list of negative projections can go on ad nauseum. But whether real or fictitious, we have a choice in the face of fear: To be immobilized or determine a course of action and get moving. The next several suggestions may help:

2) Take stock. Make a list of all your assets and strengths. Consult with your personal team of experts. Get a true picture of what is going on in your life and business. This could involve a thorough financial check-up. If you’re in business, take a look at your business plan, your marketing plan, your results. If it’s a health matter, find out what is really going on with a complete round of tests. If it’s fixable, fix it. If you’re obsessing over something you have no control over, consider it a distraction and go to step three.

3) Create a plan based on the vision of where you see yourself in two to five years. Make it detailed. Write it down. This single step can help you shift from overwhelm to clarity and focus almost magically. There are ample studies to validate this truth: Those who have written goals and plans consistently succeed. For those who have no goals, or who carry them around in their heads, the likelihood of making them happen is much slimmer. Be sure to schedule time to review your vision and plan regularly.

4) Plan activities that take you toward your vision every day. Don’t confuse a small action with no action. Even if it’s a nano-step, it’s still a step. A mentor of mine long ago reminded me that “action cancels fear.” So, take one courageous step a day, regardless of its size toward your dreams and goals. Take responsibility for nurturing your goals, for providing the proper environment for them to grow, and above all, for acting upon them. The old adage, “inch by inch it’s a cinch; yard by yard it’s hard,” applies here.

5) Surround yourself with positive, optimistic people. Right now we need to be around people who are reminding us that great things are still happening in our world. I want to have conversations with people who are hopeful about the present and the future. I want to be around people who bring with them an attitude of gratitude. As the famous motivational speaker, Jim Rohn, reminds us, “Where you will be in five years will largely be determined by the people you surround yourself with and the information you take in through reading or other channels.” At the very least, limit your exposure to negaholics, toxic people and energy vampires. If you don’t know any positive, optimistic people, join my Facebook group, The AchieveMore Method. There are 800 positive people in this group and it’s free to join.

6) Immerse yourself in books that both inform and inspire, remind you of your personal power and your capability to face and overcome challenges. There are several books I turn to again and again to keep me focused in the midst of chaos. That list includes the Bible, The Science of Success, The Greatest Salesman on Earth, Gifts from Eykus, Think and Grow Rich, and audio programs by inspiring speakers including Deepak Chopra, Wayne Dyer, Denis Waitley and others. These voices of wisdom have stood the test of time, have weathered the storms of economic and social chaos and downturns. You have 100% choice over the information you allow into your personal mental domain.

7) Develop the habit of inner stillness. Use whatever means reflects your personal orientation—from prayer to meditation to walks in nature. You don’t have to prescribe to a particular spiritual tradition to find your path to inner stillness. More than 30 years ago, Dr. Herbert Benson of Harvard University School of Medicine wrote the best-selling book, “The Relaxation Response” in which he described both the benefits and the methods of cultivating the habit of inner stillness. This single habit alone could transform your mental and emotional state from chaos to clarity, from fearful to peaceful in a relatively short span of time. A recent coaching client said it beautifully: “Meditation is the medication to cure your agitation.” Even five minutes a day is sufficient to begin altering your inner landscape. What do you have to lose except a lot of fear and phantom anxiety?

8) Remember the wise words of your mother, “This too shall pass.” The less you resist what is happening in life, the more you embrace even the rocky places on your path and acknowledge they may be bringing you some hidden blessing, the more quickly the difficult circumstances seem to move on. Interview someone who has been on the planet for 80+ years; they’ll help you put things in perspective.

I am hopeful that whatever challenges you may be facing, whatever fear seems to be nipping at your heels or looming like that 20-foot monster in front of you, that at least one of the ideas I’ve shared here will lift you beyond fear’s grip and place you back on the path where you can choose to see that anything is still possible.

“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” Say “no” to fear and anxiety and get moving in the direction of your dreams.

This article originally appeared in the Winter 2021 issue of CHOICES Magazine