The Secret to Serendipity’s Magic

My family could have written a book on the power of being optimistic. It would have been a great read too: chock full of Americana hardships complete with its own Manifest Destiny spin. There was their farm that succumbed to drought, patriarchal abuse, splintering divorce, and the grand ramble to Hollywood, CA. But, despite there being no money under the mattress (or anywhere else for that matter), we never felt poor. We never felt downtrodden or less than. And no matter how many hard knock challenges life threw at us, they seemed to overcome it all with an attitude that everything would always get better.

Looking back to my early childhood years, living on those tree lined streets of Troost Avenue in North Hollywood, I was different from the children with whom I played. Even at school, I felt “older” and really preferred to be around adults. Sure, I loved the sailing down the street on my roller skates. Yet, what I really loved was spending time with my grandmother. Grandma Mary was my whole world! Making lemonade from lemons was literally how my Grandma Mary refocused through the tough times. She would pluck a lemon from one of her giant trees in the backyard and sweeten away. I don’t ever remember her complaining. She was active in her church and often had groups of lovely hearted ladies in her home for Bible study. Oh, how I loved listening to their stories and watching their admiration for each other. They exemplified such a strong connection to one another; always empathetic and so very compassionate.

Maybe I picked this up by osmosis? I carried this uncanny ability to sense what others were feeling or what was going on around me. Somehow, I just “knew” and developed a talent for asking the right question or making the right comment that made others feel better. I also discovered that whatever I wanted, I somehow was able to get – manifest is the word we use now. Looking back over those formative years, I feel such a sense of gratitude for the influence my beloved grandmother had on me.

Eventually, I started my own business consulting company. It was there that I discovered a truism that shaped my transformation from business consultant to transformational coach. It was simply this, “people who feel good about who they are, where they are, who they’re with, and the world in general, produce better results, personally and professionally.”

Coaching has given me a wonderful career. What has led me to where I am is true Serendipity: the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy and unexpected way. I see clearly how each of my experiences from childhood, young adulthood, to now – have been shaped by finding something valuable when looking for something else.

I’ve learned that optimism is a choice. And that’s the foundation of coaching: guiding choices. That’s why my journey was always headed here. For those who were raised surrounded by toxic negativity, I help them see life from another perspective. I encourage them to be positively hopeful regardless of circumstance.

The science of optimism is compelling – optimists are more likely to persevere in the face of difficulty, set a greater number of goals, be more successful in academic, social and professional situations – and maintain higher levels of well-being and mental health during high times of stress. The best part is it’s a choice! It’s free and people can learn to live an optimistic life energized with gratitude that leaves no room for regrets. Perhaps this is the secret to serendipity’s magic.

This article originally appeared in the Spring 2018 issue of CHOICES Magazine