Permission Granted

By Holly Duckworth

Do you remember permission slips back when you were in school? Any time your class would go on a field trip, you would have to have a parent or guardian sign a permission slip so you could go. As children, when we were growing up and expanding our world, we had to have someone else grant us permission to do so. Are you still waiting for your permission slip to empower yourself to grow and expand?

It may seem obvious, as adults, we don’t need the permission of another to do something. Yet, many of us unconsciously are waiting for someone else to go first, or give us permission that it is safe to show up in a different way. How often do you spend looking outside yourself for power to proceed? You say to yourself, “I’ll do this when I have the money. I’ll become this when I have the time.” It’s easier to wait and wonder sometimes than sign our own permission slip.

While on an early spring vacation I checked into a hotel and did all the normal stuff, name, dates, rate and credit card. Tamara, the front desk associate, handed me my room keys and I proceeded about my night. My night happened to include a swim in the local hot springs. As I walked back into the hotel lobby, resembling a wet dog, I was hoping not to see anyone. Of course, out comes Tamara, “Hi, Ms. Holly, do you have any of your books in your car?” she says. I smile, and suggest, “Was my mom, my traveling companion, down here bragging again.” “No,” she replied, “I Googled you. You are a famous motivational author,” she explained. “You arriving here is just the sign I needed. “ I look down and realized my state of wet-dog. I went on to tell her I had a book, and if she would like to buy a copy, I would return with one after I freshened up and we could talk more.

When I went back down to get her the book, Tamara told me more about how I was “a sign” for her, that she is to get a new job, her dream job, to manage a restaurant. While I hardly think my presence in her life was a sign, which was the story she was telling herself. I couldn’t change that but maybe I could help. Tamara was looking for something outside of herself to give her permission to grow and expand.

In my keynote speeches, I have an exercise where I invite audience members to tell me what they need a permission slip for. For some it’s permission to use their vacation, others to make more money, for many it’s simply empowering a dream. I write them out a custom permission slip with their name on it. Think of it kind of like a doctor handing you a prescription. See below – I’ve attached a permission slip for your own empowerment.

Stop waiting for someone or something outside yourself to give you the power to make a change! Draw your power from within. I believe that from our childhood, we are conditioned that we need mommy and daddy’s “permission” to do something or go somewhere new. That is simply not the case. We need to authentically empower ourselves. Empowerment is permission from within, maybe, supported by a few close friends.

Tamara and I had a great talk about her first 50 years on the planet and her desires for the next 50. In the conversation, she empowered herself to believe again. Funny, the letter “B” in my Mindful Leadership: The A to Z Guide for Stress-free Leadership book is “Believe,” and her first initial of her name was “T”, the practice of trust. My book helped her to believe in herself and trust the process.

Summer should be a time of play and expansion, testing boundaries, and trying new things. This summer as you soak up the power of the sun, give yourself a permission slip to grow and expand. Give those around you the same permission and see how you grow, expand, and have more fun.

Now is the most powerful time, the only time you have, to take credit for who you are. As you can see I have pre-signed it. Permission to powerfully choose you, granted!