We live in a negative world. It seems like no one has anything nice to say or people are complaining about everything that comes their way. It’s no wonder they are stuck in thankless lives. These people go out of their way to find problems no matter what solutions are presented to them. We all get caught up in this and it is often referred to as a negativity loop. It is a bad habit that we develop.

If you currently find nothing right with the world, you may be stuck in that negativity loop yourself. If so, it’s time to reverse it to positivity. It can be done but it takes some effort. However, if you don’t break the cycle, you will continue to be unhappy.

This should be the first question you ask yourself… Am I happy? If the answer is no, try to figure out the reasons why. If you are excessively negative, that should be the first place to look.

People don’t like to fault themselves and will always look to everyone else as being the ones with the problems. However, if you look deeper within yourself, you may find it is you who is causing the problems.

Try to find the good in people. Everyone has good qualities and by focusing more on those rather than faults, you can start to turn around your attitude towards life. Start with your family. If you are cross with your spouse or kids, talk to them about the reasons why. If it’s ongoing, they may tell you it has to do with something you are doing (or not doing). It could be you aren’t spending enough time with them. When was the last time you attended a soccer game or other event with your kids? How about your spouse? Have you gone out to dinner lately?

If you are having issues at work, you need to get to the bottom of that as well. If you are upset with several of your co-workers, this could be another sign that you are the problem. This is not to say others aren’t doing what they should. It’s just that you need to take a closer look to make sure you aren’t causing more stress in the work environment.

Make yourself a list of the people in your life who are positive and spend more time with those people. If you hear yourself saying something negative, give yourself a pep talk explaining why you need to turn your self-talk around. If you are deliberately doing things to goad other people, stop it. It may be a joke to you, but perhaps they don’t find it to be so funny. Say affirmations in the morning. Listen to positive music. Read positive mental attitude books. Stay away from people who are negative. Someone has to bust out of the negativity loop. Why not you?

This article originally appeared in the Autumn 2018 issue of CHOICES Magazine