Sometimes when life hits you hard, it feels so unfair that you just want to scream or cry or both. It makes you feel as if the wind has been knocked out of you. You hold your sides and try to catch your breath. You feel defeated, alone, angry, and frustrated.

What if you STOPPED for a moment and paused. What if I told you, instead of being negative and angry, say, “Thank you.”

Yes, instead of an adverse reaction, simply say, “Thank you. Thank you for my life. Thank you for bringing me these difficulties and obstacles because I don’t know your ultimate plan for me. Do what you want with me!”

A spiritual belief tells us to serve God— “I will do Thy will” —and we must learn to practice this rule for two excellent reasons.

1. God can see around corners … we can’t.
2. This is how we learn to trust in God’s will for our life. It’s the ultimate act that helps us to “Let Go and Let God.”

Learn to say, “Thank you for letting me fall sometimes and the difficulties you put me through. I still trust in you, even if I don’t understand it all at that moment. Deep down, I know there must be a reason. I know you are making me stronger.”

So, change the strategy of any negativity and say, “Thank you.” Our negative emotions can hide our ability to see clearly. Yet, how much grief would we save ourselves if we immediately said the words, “Thank you?” Arguments would be squelched in a nanosecond—you wouldn’t even have to prove you were right! Immediately, you change the energy from looking for fault to the most potent positive emotion you possess… gratitude. It gives you a moment to change direction from a negative response to appreciation. Gratitude gives you the space, time, and courage to change direction. It immediately allows you to interrupt the “blame game” pattern. And it gives you more time to choose a new way to behave.

Truly this is easier said than done. The other day, I was in an argument over the Covid 19 vaccine. My husband was against the vaccine being mandated, and I was ambivalent. Instead of carrying the conversation into a heated debate, I stopped midsentence and said, “Thank you.” The whole discussion changed in tone. Instead of getting crossways with each other, it opened both of us to look at the merits of both sides.

The next time you find yourself in a potentially hurtful situation, stop, pause, and say, “Thank you.” You may save yourself some heartache and open yourself to a new way of thinking.

Let’s change the strategy and be thankful!

This article originally appeared in the Autumn 2021 issue of CHOICES Magazine